Still here...

Man this whole "keeping up with a blog thing" is much more difficult than I thought. Currently, I am sitting here with red dye in my hair, watching Grey's Anatomy, so excited that tomorrow is the first day of my typical Halloween festivities. You see Halloween to me, and females across the nation for that matter, is the one day a year that girls can dress like total sluts and other girls can't say anything about it. Only I don't dress up one day, I wear a different costume on the Friday and Saturday prior to Halloween. It's tradition. Tomorrow is my all-time favorite costume I own. Pirate hooker. Saturday is always my new costume of the year. This year is my make-shift 1950's Desperate Housewife costume I put together. Photo montage to follow.
I'll keep you posted. Hope all is well is Blogspotland.

*Ding of alarm sounding time to rinse obnoxiously red hair dye."

A Wanton Hussy and a Tart walk into a bar...

For the record, I popped three Advil and drank a large glass of water before I drifted off to REM and consequently am left with only the remnants of what appears to have been a large hangover. I love being 23. Elusive roommate and I long for our days of youth, 21 and 22, when we were in college and the entire 48 hour period of Saturday and Sunday was spent "nursing" our hangovers. This consisted of eating whatever we wanted, as much as we wanted, and as often as we wanted, drinking Green Tea (we swear by it) and curling up on the couch to watch as MUCH Food Network as conceivable. Unfortunately, I have way too much stuff to do today to lay on the couch.

Saturday To Do List
1) Clean filthy apartment - Bathroom, Kitchen, Bedroom.
2) Purchase necessary makeup
3) Get oil change, tires rotated (I have put this one off for months now and really needs to get done.)
4) Workout (This one I have also put off recently and with sexy Halloween costumes right around the corner, I must check this one off today.)
5) Lunch with Tart, Bint and Doctor C? Sorry girls. Might not happen.
6) BBQ with Elusive Roommate thrown by her co-worker in Oceanside at six.

Okay, now that I wrote it down, it's not as massive, but I know each thing is going to take an hour or two. See "Anonymous" if you write down all the things that you think are so pertinent and time consuming and are adding such stress to your life, it really isn't all that much.

And for the record, it's now 10:00 and Tart is still sleeping in my bed.
The small wrench in my to do list is that my car is not here at my apartment, but rather in the parking lot of the bar we frequented last night. My choices are limited to getting my car. 1) Bike down to my car. 2) Take a $10 cab to my car. 3) Jog down to my car (roughly 2 miles) thus eliminating the #4 component of my to do list. Hmm.. what to do? What to do?

First things first, coffee.

Tart and Wwanton Hussy commin actcha

No backspacing. purer drunk blogging. Twoo bitches commin actcha.

Recal:
*Recap:

Tart's botto *brother gave me a major thong wedgie. We aate pcizzaa.. Lots of piszzaaa!!! Inententionional usee of pizzzzzzaaaaa!!! PTart passed out on my courch. Ran into guy that says he "fel l in love with me for five minutes" a few years agao. What is lve? *love? Is love a curse ? I think so. It sonly seems to make thing s more compliceated then they have to be. Tar t is paseed out on cousch.

Anywho, boy from highs chool gropingly rubbed back of me and tart.

tar t had to put foot on floor because she gots the sips *spings. *Us. *spins. Tart's going to vom. ...

h
Oh gd.
Oh god.
Here it comes.
I can feeel ut,'
u8]]Sye sa6
She says shes really sick.


"Just bring me some water. Roome temperature. Not coled. *Cold."

"Lime or lemon?"

"Fuck you."


That's lovoe.

*That's love.

*Attempt at druck (drunk) blogging results in success.


Want to hear the real funny thing?

Boy whome I have been "seeing" hung up on me tonight which is a cardinal sin in my book, which he is well aware of. Which resulted in A) talkind to a boy who looked familarily B) giving my phone number to noy who looked familiar and C) maybe the boy calling who looke d familiar and consequently HAD "fallen in love with me" months a go.

What a crazy world we live in...

Did I already mention that I intenitaionally did NOT back space in order to fiv *give the full randge of debauchersy the resulted from te eveing ?

I realiazed though that whe n I am sboer *Sober my b,oof *blogs would be the same inf* if did not bavck space because w *let's fae *ffave *fav *face it backspace happens...


Gootta go. Tart neeeds "roomat *"rao *"room temp" water.

You know you're a Wanton Hussy when...

aka. You know it's time to move when...

I have been born and raised Orange County, California, as I have explained. But this is just ridiculous. Let me back up. I have dated a lot of guys in my last 23 years. I mean A LOT. All kinds too. Tall, short, fat, skinny, bald, hairy, hot, not so hot, funny, smart, dumb, sober, ex-addicts, Atheist, Christian, Catholic, athletes, non-athletes, surfers, swimmers, lifeguards, etc. I dated the most in my life when I attended my necessary two years at a local Community College. I have a theory that people date the most during Junior College because they have the most money, as most live at home during this time period, but at the same time have a job because it is what is expected of them, due to the little demand on their time for studies. This job + no rent = large amounts of money to be spent on adult activities such as dating. As most people in a junior college are between the ages of 18 and 22, this seems like the necessary activity post-high school, pre-career. So I dated. A lot. And I loved it. I loved getting taken out on the weekends and having "older" guys "hit" on me and approach me because let's be honest, the boys in High School do not do the whole approach and courting deal as they don't have to. That is what freshmen girls are for. I have a point.

Fast forward five years. I am now 23, occasionally date, mind mostly on Eurotrip 2007. I attended a wedding a few weekends ago. My relation to the bride and groom? I attended the wedding as (pay attention) the date, to a friend, of the brother, of the bride. Got it? Far removed, right? But on the side of the bride nonetheless. I arrive to the wedding only to realize that the valet guy and I went to high school together. Enter date thinking I get around. I think, "What a small world. I am an hour away from where I went to high school and am running into people. Man, it's time to move." I get to the site that the wedding is set up at and see the picture of the bride and groom. "Okay, so that is who I know here. The bride. That is what she looks like and I am here to celebrate her day. Got it." I notice someone who looks strangely familiar wearing a tux. He appears to be one of the groomsmen. I call the bride's-brother over and ask him the name of the groomsmen. "Oh, that guy? That's Kansas."

"I dated him when I went to Junior college. What a small world. How funny." I exclaim.

"Yeah, that's the guy that marrying my sister today." Bride's-brother confirms.

"I... ah.. bu...we....No, it was really innocent. Just like out to coffee and to study... We never even kissed... because I thought he had bad teeth... and... teeth are huge with me." Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

"Oh, I don't care. Frankly, I think he's kind of a dork. What were you doing dating a guy like him? It was a pity date huh?"

Ummm... flattering yes. Basically, bride's-brother thinks I am the cat's meow. But that is not the point. The point is that I went to a wedding thinking I didn't know anyone and it turns out I dated the GROOM. Small world? Or do I just need to get out of Dodge? Let me take this opportunity to finish my theoretical statement, "You know you are a Wanton Hussy when you show up at a wedding thinking you don't know anyone, only to realize you DATED the groom."

I told my parents the story the next day. Mom's jaw hit the floor. Dad told a similar story in which he went to a wedding where he had dated the bride. "Yes Dad, but did you know that you were going to her wedding?" "Well, yeah..." "Okay, now imagine you didn't know that it was her wedding." "Oh."

"Yeah, so I think this officially means I need to move. Orange County has officially become too small."

"No." My dad begins to see the glass half-full. "This just means you have good networking skills." Oh, dad. Whatever it takes to not think that your first born is a total floozy. Whatever it takes.

It's been too long...

Update:
I have informed my job that as of Jan 26th, 2007 I will no longer be an employee. Fed up with gender specific job qualifications you ask? No. Elusive roommate and I, as of February 5th, 2007 will be embarking on what I expect to be the greatest adventure of our lives. I will be moving to Europe. "Europe is huge. Where exactly?" Well... here is the tentative schedule.
Three months of "trekking" around. Anywhere. All the places we want to go. Or none of the places we want to go. We fly over to Dusseldorf, Germany, where elusive roommate's grandma and aunt live. We get our bearings and head off to Amsterdam (enter sly smile) and Holland and anywhere that is a relatively close trainride. Last week of February we are back in Dusseldorf for the annual Carnival, which is the German version of Mardi Gras.
Then we are off... From Carnival we head over to Paris, London, only to arrive in Dublin, Ireland for March 17th. Why March 17th? Luck o' the Irish, it's St. Patrick's Day!! That was my genius idea I must add. From Dublin we proceed to explore Portugal, Spain and Italy only to arrive in Prague, Czech Republic by April 23rd. Why April 23rd? Because that is when our teaching course begins. Elusive roommate and I am going to take an accredited course for a month which teaches you how to teach English to individuals for which it is not their first language.
Now here is the scary part to me. After our month in Prague, where we go and how long we go for is entirely undecided up to this point. We could stay in Prague and teach for the summer and then go somewhere else for a semester, we're thinking Berlin or Spain. But before we begin teaching we are going to go to Greece for a few days because it is relatively close and because it's FREAKIN' Greece. No, I'm not excited or anything.
So what this all means on the homefront is that everyday has been consumed with thoughts of Europe, getting to Europe, staying in Europe, drinking in Europe, teaching in Europe, etc. I am well on my way with the denouement of this chapter of my life. I love that word, denouement. It really is the only relevant thing I remember from High School English. In basically means, "the tying up of loose ends." I am selling my car, "loaning" my dog to some friends, moving out of our amazing score of an apartment, quitting my job, etc.
If you have any advice of where to go, where to stay, what to do, hints, techniques, or anything having to do with any European destination please comment as I would love to hear it. Oh, and I will continue to blog as I would hate to disappoint my endearing fans and since elusive roommate will be bringing her lap top. Ciao Bella! See, I'm already learning...

I'm still alive.

But sans motivation to sit down and spend time on one of my masterpieces.
That fishing trip took a lot out of me apparently.
I have some ideas for blogs that came to me yesterday, but other than that my life was boring, uninteresting and lacking some serious Hussiness.

Future blog titles to look for include "You know you are a Hussy when..." and "If only I had a camera."

Don't worry. You can't get rid of me that easily. WINK!